Saturday, November 19, 2011

Seriously, 4 am?

I get it now when they say the end of pregnancy is preparing you for baby. It's 4 am and here I am updating da blog! Figured it was time since its been like 2.5 months. Well were almost there, coming up on 39 weeks! I have been trying to stay at work as long as I can but being on my feet for 12 hours with no sleep is getting to be slightly impossible. Hence me calling off today. 

I'm getting to the point of anxiety, anxious to meet this little boy who will forever be part of my existence. It's so weird to think of a human life being created, in a little over a week (hopefully not any longer) Jacob and I will literally be adding someone new to the world, it might be the most exciting feeling I've ever had slash the most terrifying. I'm terrified because for the last 9 months I've thought of almost nothing else but this little boy...and his room, his clothes, what car seat to buy, which fabric to use for his bedding, what books I should buy to read to him...but now its what kind of Mother will I be to him? Will I be patient, will I know how to comfort him, will I know how to protect him from the world...and will I be good at it? I have known since the moment I saw Jacob with his nieces and nephews that he will be good at this...he loves to play, he is extremely patient, and the connections he makes with those that are close to him is unlike anything I've ever seen. This kid is gonna be a dang good Dad.I say kid cause even though he's almost 25 he's kinda just a big kid. 
All I can do now is just wait....wait for these next 11 days to go by to meet this lil person whose been hanging out inside me for the last 9 months. Wait to see the kind of Mother I can be to him. Wait to see what he's gonna look like, what his personality will be like, what he'll like and dislike, and wait to know what this lil boys life will hold. I'm getting overwhelmed just thinking about this journey we are about to start...but I am so excited for it I can hardly stand it! Here are some pics of the room, I have thought about it almost constantly since we found out what we were having...I think it was my way of letting him know how much I'm in love with him already.